Who Cares If I'm A Virgin?


"Why should I be a virgin anyway?"

"It's my life so who cares?" These are questions that ran through my mind as a young teenage girl...all of which were left unanswered, for me to figure out by myself. I had to figure out if it was worth it or not to protect my virginity.

Unfortunately, I didn't have a value for virginity because I didn't have a vision for my future. All I ever heard was, "Don't have sex because it's wrong outside of marriage."

No one told me how valuable my virginity was. No one told me that though it would be hard at times to protect my purity in heart, mind and body, it would lead me to freedom, to joy and to an abundant life, without shame or guilt riding on my coat tails.

No one told me what losing my virginity would cost me. No one told me how much pain I would go through later on in life when I was desiring to be married. No one told me that when I'd be sitting across from my boyfriend, he would tell me he couldn't see himself being with someone who had had sex before. No one told me that not being a virgin would feel like a curse when I was looking for a husband.

I didn't know there were men in the world who took virginity and purity seriously. (Which there are!) I found out the hard way when some chose to not choose me because I am not a virgin.

I didn't know the heartbreak I would go through all because of stupid mistakes in my past.

What I did know was that God would love me. I knew that no matter what I did, He would still choose me. I knew that when I was "older" I would start obeying Him again. But at the time I thought, "For now I just want to have fun." ("Fun" being having sex with whoever I want, whenever I want.) I knew that somehow, no matter what, God would love me when I decided to follow Him again.

And guess what? He did! And He'll do the same for you!

But guess what? I still had to deal with the consequences of my behavior. And I did.

It was a long process, and let me tell you it is still not easy at times, but I have high hopes for my future, my relationships and my marriage, because of the vision He's given me.

Virgin or not, God loves you.

He makes all things new.

He is the God who redeems.

He is the God who gives us what we don't deserve!

My heart in sharing this small bit of my story is this: that someone like you may catch a bit of vision that could change your life for the better. It's not about scaring you into good choices; it's about showing you reality, both joyful and difficult. God is able to redeem everything, but it cost Him greatly. In fact, it cost Him everything He had. Don't take it for granted, but live your life of purity to the fullest, knowing how much it is worth!

-- Jessica Kopp (Intern)